good one

[missfishylicious]

>SUBJECT :  THE TRUCKER AND THE BLONDE
> >
> >
> >As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps
> >out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The
> >trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is Heather and
> >you are losing some of your load." The trucker ignores her and
> >proceeds down the
> street.
> >When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up
> >again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door.
> >Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the
> >blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some
> >of your load!"
> Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the
> street. >At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out
> of >breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the
> truck >door. The trucker lowers the window. Again she says "Hi, my
> name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!" When the light
> turns >green the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he
> stops >this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to
> the blonde. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says...
> >"Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter here in Upstate NY and I'm driving
> the SALT TRUCK! >>>>
>
just thought you guys and gals would like this one

[Bobberstop]

NEAT JOKE

[alpinehigh]

Pretty clean joke Missy
heres one

A man was stopped by a game-warden in Pigeon Lake recently with two buckets of fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing

The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"

The man replied to the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."

"Pet fish?!" the warden replied.

"Yes, sir. Every night I take these here fish down to the lake and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their buckets, and I take em home."

"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!"

The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works."

"O.K. I've GOT to see this!" The game warden was curious.

The man poured the fish in to the river and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said, "Well?"

"Well, what?" the man responded.

"When are you going to call them back?" the game warden prompted.

"Call who back?" the man asked.

"The FISH"

"What fish?" the man asked.

[Big_Ray]

Now that was funny Alpinehigh I`ve got to remember that one.

[rgfixit]

A blonde wanted to go ice-fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary "tools" together, she made for the nearest frozen lake.

 After positioning her comfy foot-stool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice.

Suddenly ---from the sky--- a voice boomed, "THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!"

Startled, the Blonde moved further down the ice, poured a Thermos of cappuccino, began to cut yet another hole.

Again, from the heavens, the voice bellowed, "THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!"

The Blonde, now quite worried, moved way down to the opposite end of the ice, sat up her stool, and tried again to cut her hole.  

The voice came once more: "THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!"

She stopped, looked skyward, and said, "Who are you --- God?"

The voice replied, "NO, I OWN THE ICE-RINK!"

RG

[acsacmboy]

heard one last year

did you hear what the ice fishing blonde from___(<insert place here)caught?

she caught 20 pounds of ice!

the poor blonde drowned trying to cook it

[SenecaBow]

Secrets of an ice-fishing expert

It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake,
cut a hole in the ice and dropped in his fishing line. He was there
for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out
>onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not far from him. The young boy
dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a largemouth
bass. The old man couldn't believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain
luck. But, shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large
catch. The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old
man couldn't take it any longer. "Son, I've been here for over an hour
without even a nibble. You've been here only a few minutes and have
caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?" The boy responded, "Roo
raf roo reep ra rums rrarm." "What was that?" the old man asked. Again
the boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm." "Look," said the
old man, "I can't understand a word you're saying." The boy spit the
contents of his mouth into his hand and said, "You have to keep the
worms warm!"

[PERCHPULLER]

A BOY AND HIS GRANDPA WERE PICKING WORMS ONE NIGHT GRAMPS GOT OUT A WORM AND TOLD THE BOY HE'D GIVE HIM 5$ IF HE COULD SHOVE THE WORM BACK DOWN THE HOLE THE BOY THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE WENT INSIDE AND GOT SOME HAIR SPRAY AND COATED THE WORM AND STUCK IT DOWN THE HOLE GRAMPS PAID UP THE NEXT MORNING AT THE BREAKFAST TABLE GRAMPS SLIPPED THE BOY ANOTHER FIN(5$) THE BOY SAYS GRAMPS YOU ALREADY PAID ME GRAMPS SAYS I KNOW THATS FROM GRANDMA

[buzzbomb]

There was a Newfoundlander out ice fishin' and he had his hole cut in the ice, and his bait, and his jar of screech (an amusing local concoction) and things were just fine, until he went to drop his worm down the hole.  He missed and accidentaly dipped his bait in the screech.  Well, quick as a wink he lifted it out and fired it strait down to the bottom of the hole.  Immediately the rod doubles over and there it is...a 25 pound salmon.  He was able to get it off and released, but it wasn't easy...the worm had 'im, right by the throat.

[Jbarker]

George was a game warden and loved to fish but he worked all summer and never got the chance to go. He heard stories from his good freiend Jack about all the fish he was catching. Jack would get his limit every time. Finally George got a weekend off so he called up Jack and asked if he could take hime fishing, Jack said sure. So early Saturday morning George arrives at Jacks house to be greeted by jack with only a cooler of beer and a tackle box. George thought nothing of and figured his rods were at the lake. 20 mins later they were in the middle of the lake. It was a beautiful day and George was happier than he had been all year, he baits his hook and tosses it over the side. Jack reaches in his cooler and pulls out a beer. George asks him, "aren't you going to fish"? so jack reaches into his tackle box grabs a stick of dynamite lights it and throws overboard it sink down a few feet and KABOOM dead fish started to float to the top. George was as white as a ghost and his eyes were as big as apples. He says to Jack," I am a game warden do you know what I have to do to you"? Jack doesn't even blink he just reaches into his tackle box grabs another stick of dynamite light it and tosses it on Georges lap and says," are you here to talk or are you here to fish"?

[daffydone]

A man was out duck hunting and he shoots a crane, meanwhile the DNR is watching the whole time. well the man picks up his crane and heads to shore,when he reaches the shore, the DNR is waiting for him, The DNR says, I saw you shoot a crane out there, the man says,yes sir I did. The DNR says, do you know that is against the law? the man says, yes sir and starts to tell the DNR that about how he lost his job, and he has to feed his family and how he wouldn't normally do this if he didn't have to feed his family and he has never done this before. well the DNR started to feel sorry for the man,so he decided to let the man off, if he promised to never do this again. the man replies and says yes sir I promise to never do this again! so the DNR starts to walk away an turns to the man and says, By the way, what does crane taste like? the man replies and says ( it tastes a little like Bald Eagle)

[howey1176]

These are all great jokes but swampthings #9 post took me. Still rollin, got read it again.

[PERCHPULLER]

yah very good

[mr._freeze]

Two good ole boys from the south decide they want to go ice fishing. They travel to Wisconsin with hopes of filling coolers full of fresh fish. They go into a bait shop and ask the owner how to get through the ice. He sells them an ice spud. Two hours later they are back buying two more. This repeats itself 2 more times when the owner finally ask "You guys are making alot of holes you catching any at all?"One replies "Catching what? we havn't even got the boat in the water yet."

[firsticerules]

mr. freeze that is one of the best ones i've heard yet and this post is the best way to pass time wile the cold weather comes.

[Fishinut]

Great. Keep em coming

[pot-belly-perch]

keep um comeing  that was some great jokes but  the salt spreader  one was the best I heard yet  it could happen if she was drunk



Steve  ps ice is comeing
soon
 8)